Saturday, 31 December 2011

Waning 2011 : Waxing 2012

So, I am now woefully behind in my blogmutterings. I Have just got off the phone with The Hev and The Shteeb and it would seem that my arse has been kicked back into action. :) My apologies to all who so desperately wish to read my crazy ramblings. and believe me, lots has been happening. I mean, I have only just posted about my hospital stay in October, for crying out loud. I've not yet even started the one about the op in November... What a pathetic correspondent I am become.

Janus, Vatican Museum
Photo © Fubar Obfusco
Anyway, we now find ourselves gazing heav'nward once more as the waning of one year is eclipsed by the waxing of the next. It is at around this time that this little Loris recognizes the quickening pace of the heart, a rush of blood to the head and a cold hand of fear accompanied by the faint freezing, mocking whispers of the Father of Lies as excitement, hope and promise of new and better, good, things for the new year ahead claim a momentary epiphany, that 'Janusian anxiety' arises. Why does the exuberance of seeing the New Year in always feel so hollow the moment the clocks are done chiming the new day in?

What is it in our collective consciousness that seems to thrive on setting ourselves up for dashed hopes and dreams? All over the place people are setting, discussing and promising faithful adherence to another set of New Year's Resolutions, largely consisting of the hundreds broken in the preceding years, which have all been railroaded by the end of the first week of the year (to a greater or lesser degree). Why on earth do we bother with this farce?

I think it lies in our need to keep going, to set goals that are attainable (because we ourselves set them) and provide ourselves with rods for our backs that we can then beat ourselves up with during Lent. Well, OK, that is a bit harsh, but it does seem rather a fair comment for some... Goal-setting is important in terms of sticking on track, making it through each day and so on. We seem always to be so full of hope as one year draws to a close and another one opens. We dust our grubby failures and broken promises off from our past year and long to get more done and do more right things the right way - this year...

Cyan Sky
© The Loris, 2010

One way or another I think that we area all approaching our new years with high, high hopes and hoping - above all - not to make the same mistakes as last year... That the new year dawns tinged with a blue feeling shows that we already know we are not going to measure up to our own marks.

So this year, as with the last three decades of resolution-making, my only plan for the year ahead is to make it out alive.

Whinge over, I hope you all have a healthy, happy, fun, silly, intellectual, meaningful love and laughter-filled 2012